T, I lost it and I know emailing it to you won't do any good... so I’ll put it here.
Monday I wanted to ask if it would upset you if I sat over in the corner. I wanted to ask if I can ask for hugs any time or just at the end of sessions. Can I ask you to hold my hand or is that something you need to initiate? I wanted to ask you to bring your phone over so I could see the picture of your granddaughter standing on your lap again. I wanted to go back to the timeline and fill more in. I wanted you beside me, beside infant me but beside me where I can see your face not beside me beside me.
Now I have a part loosing her flipping mind that you almost got to infant me. I’m afraid I’m going to end up with us in the chairs again above everything, separated.... no connection until the hug at the end. I’m not in the mood for one of those sessions and you don’t have space for me to make it up. You are home two sessions and then gone again.
This sucks.