You could have taken it as a compliment, that you didnt seem new, that ever since you got there youve had a finger in every pie and had contributed to many different process improvements. The worst that could be said is that you didnt know what you DID know.

Instead, its like you got afraid of something unseen and backed down, instead of embracing the opportunity. I thought maybe because it wasnt a technical position? I know i never wanted to move to a support type position, i always wanted to be on the front lines of development. I think it would be okay to say that. Nobody wants to make a technical person unhappy - we are not that easily replaceable!

This power struggle came at the same time as stuff in your personal life, and i wonder if you werent just saying no at work, because it was easier than saying no at home. Or your words at home were not being respected so you wanted them respected at work. Because all of it just doesnt make sense.

You were doing so well, getting your process improvements, both for the customer and internal ones, approved, and then you start finding "ethical" fault with them. The customer is not your boss. You need to present a professional face to the customer, you KNOW that. Why so nitpicky? It sounds like a general problem with authority, and IME - in my very sad experiences! - that will kill ya at work.