I advise clients to take the bequest. You don't have to do anything with the money for awhile, just put it in the bank if you want. But not taking it doesn't hurt the deceased and it doesn't teach them a lesson or have any impact on them at all. If you decide later on you don't want the money, then give it to a charity. But at least that way you gave yourself the opportunity to make a more informed choice rather than a knee jerk reaction one.