Well, I happen to love soul music and there's a monthly night going on now... My social phobia/depression/anxiety acts up just like yours.
What I've been doing in the past months is, I know that my brain is trying to be louder than my friends in 3D so I work hard on not letting it be so loud.

Instead of thinking, I just dress up and, most importantly, smear a lil makeup on my face - it's always worked for me. The makeup kinda plays the part of fantasy, as if I could turn into another self.

Believe me, it works. So I just stop thinking and start acting - getting dressed, choosing my earrings, perfume, lipstick; and I leave the house as soon as I'm done.

I never ever regret doing that. Always end up dancing a lot and forgetting my mental issues for the night. The simple effort of going is always rewarded by the fun I end up having.

Good Luck :-)