I ****ing hate myself so much and feel so ugly and worthless right now. He’s turned me down every single time I’ve initiated for the last 2 years. And yet literally any time he wants sex, I’m down without any hesitation, even if it’s the middle of the night and I was sleeping. I feel pathetic and like I must be a special kind of hideous that my husband isn’t attracted to me even when I’m putting my whole self out there, if you get what I mean. Why the **** do I have to look like this, if I was better, would he want me?