Take focus of diagnosis and focus on improvement. Hating diagnosis is fine but it isn’t getting you no where if you don’t accept you need help.

My boss was recently diagnosed with diabetes and she was very upset about it. But knowing what she has led to her taking meds and following better diet so now she is doing much better. If she decided that she doesn’t have diabetes because she hates the diagnosis and hates her doctor, she’s be still eating junk and not taking meds and is very likely she’d be dead by now.

You have two options.

One not accept diagnosis and the fact that you need help and go on the way you did for years and you’ll be posting exact same things 5-10-20 years from now. The other option is focus on getting better with professional help and seriously work on lessening your symptoms. And hopefully you’ll have a better happier life.