I 100% concur with Blogwriter. Your friend, Lonelyman, is EXTREMELY manipulative of you b/c you either choose not to, or don't have, very strong interpersonal boundaries with your overbearing male friend. Not OCD. Nope. Just a controlling, very manipulative person -- this friend of yours.

The only way to regain control of YOUR life and this 'friendship' with this man, is to stand up to him. He won't stop acting overbearing and controlling until you stop allowing him to act that way with you. Create consequences for his behavior with you, when it crosses the appropriate line from helpful to downright controlling. The consequence could be, you said no, so don't give in, and continue to say no. Don't show up just because he demands that you do. If he invites someone to 'give you some tips' tell him in a way he'll understand to stop doing that. Let him know it bothers you (because it does).

He will never change unless you set up consequences for him or conditions. Otherwise, he'll continue to walk all over you and be overbearing and continue to try to control every aspect of your friendship and life. And who needs that?