I have never been comfortable in a home.

When I was a kid I hated, HATED my house. It was old and nasty and my mom had zero interest in doing anything to it. But I could have lived with that. But it was natural gas. I was always afraid of natural gas. It could kill even if you did nothing. And also it has that smell. All during the year. It isn't as if you can shut it off in the winter.

So I went to an apartment for grad school. This was the best of the lot. However, it was in michigan and no storm shelter. So tornado warnings were terrifying. It had a gas fireplace, but also, it was temporary so I had rented furniture that I had to keep in good shape.

Then I got my own apartment and this was also ok, but it had some serious issues. During the winter the heat pump made amazing noise. It was IN the bathroom. Making for terrible showers. Then on cold nights it simply couldn't handle the job. I would suffer greatly with cold on nights it got below 10 degrees. It wasn't combustable though. But I always felt like that too was a stop where I was waiting for the real thing. I never got a washer and dryer because the new heater I got took up all the room.

Finally I got to the place I am at now.. this is it I thought... now true. I have a heat pump that can survive down to -10. It is 2 floors below me at night so I can't hear much at all. And, I plan to be here for 10+ years. But I still feel uncomfortable. There isn't a single year some disaster doesn't happen in this place. Today I woke up to some sort of an animal trying to get under my stairs and digging a massive hole. But there are several things wrong with the place and I just feel like every single day there is something to do related to the place.

So I thought I would ask? Just me? Every single place I have ever lived has bothered me in some way. I am starting to wonder if that is going to be the situation forever.