I don't aim for understanding. Even my therapist and pdoc will never truly understand. I don't think this is something one can really understand unless they experience it for themselves. Losing control of your own mind is a very hard thing to explain. I tried my best to understand when my mother had her episode. I researched. I begged her to explain it to me. I did my best, but I was confused as to how a smart woman could lose control to such a degree. I thought she was more to blame than she let on. Then I lived it myself. I get it now.

I don't need everyone to understand me, but I hope they can accept me and love me despite what happened. I appreciate those that try to understand and offer help even if they are misguided. I come here to interact with people who actually do understand.