Thanks, all, for your advice. Definitely gives me something to think about. The only thing that makes this kind of tricky is that I also have OCD, and there was a time in the past when I was dealing with unwanted thoughts and confessing all of them to my wife. It hurt her deeply, even though most of them were not my fault but due to my illness. Granted, I had struggled with these sexual issues in the past, so I don’t blame it all on the OCD. Anyway, she forgave me for the things I was responsible for and began to understand OCD and that the thoughts were not my own or my desire.

It was after going through those hard times that I started to have problems with mania, then was put on antidepressant for the OCD, which only made the mania worse. Now, I have the right diagnosis and have started to feel real remorse over my actions during those episodes. But because of all that history, I don’t want to put her through that pain again (even though I think she will be more understanding this time). I feel like we went through unnecessary pain for a lot of things that weren’t real, including a lot of false guilt, so it’s like I think I’m entitled to a pass on this one to make up for that.

Sorry for the long post, and thanks again for your candid responses. I’ll definitely consider it some more and pray about it.