I am deeply sorry for your situation, @ianGallagher! You're not alone as we can ALL relate to what you're saying. Life with MI can be hard especially when we have NO ONE supporting us. However you're still fighting and THIS makes you MUCH, MUCH stronger than you believe you ARE! Please be proud of yourself. If it can help, my Inbox is ALWAYS open for you. Feel free to PM me ANYTIME if you please! I'm ALWAYS available when you need Advice and Support! I'm sure PLENTY of others will be glad to help you as well! Are you seeing a therapist? I feel like that may REALLY help you if you can afford that. Please NEVER give up Hope and KEEP FIGHTING AS MUCH AS YOU POSSIBLY CAN LIKE YOU'RE ALREADY WONDERFULLY DOING! Sending many safe, warm hugs to you, ianGallagher, and ALL of your Loved Ones!