Hi, my 22 yr old son has Aspergers syndrome and lives with me. He refuses to help with chores and things around the house and garden. I have a chronic disability and am frequently bed-bound, sometimes for up to 10 days at a time but I do everything. He does 12 hours university a week and the rest is spent playing computer games. I can't fathom how he lives in his room because of how disgusting and filthy it is. I frequently have to tell him just to get a shower and use deodorant.
We argue about his lack of contribution but he never helps and tells me "I don't want to". It's been 6 months and I feel abused. I went to a clinical psychologist for 12 sessions and they left the practice before I received advice. I saw another psychologist for 5 sessions and they also left without giving advice. I have no money left for additional psychologists or counsellors etc to talk about a solution. I am heavily in debt with previous medical bills and I've already sold everything I can sell.
Please understand this has blown into a big problem and I feel debilitated by the extra effort to clean up after him as well as my health. He cries when I've told him he will need to leave but he still lives here. I have other personal issues I should be focusing on. I never thought I'd be in this position.
I talked to my doctor about it and recently been given a clinical depression diagnosis and I'm on some heavy tablets that come with their own problems. I'm at my wits end. I can't cope with him and I'm on a downward spiral. I rarely go out and have zero friends and my family lives overseas in London so I have zero support structure.
Due to a lack of funding for psychologists, I've read many internet sites for suggestions with people in a similar position and none worked so I thought maybe I need to go back to the beginning and start fresh. If you have any thoughts then it will be appreciated. All I ask is you don't under-estimate the severity this has had on me as well as coping with a long-term disability that limits me. I feel I'm a complete failure and nothing seems to reach him.