Hi IanGallagher! (Love your choice in name by the way... I am a big Shameless fan. My favorite characters are Ian and Mickey....but anyway...)
Thanks for sharing your story. You are not alone. It really helps to have support, and this place has helped me a lot, since it is hard to find people out there where I have felt safe to talk about Bipolar Disorder.
As others have said, reading and educating yourself is a helpful way of dealing with BP. Therapy can help as well. You are certainly resilient and have inner strengths, whether you are aware of it or not!!