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Old Aug 06, 2019, 11:29 AM
Elio Elio is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2006
Location: in my head
Posts: 2,913
I don't know how long you've been working with this T, it seems like a while. It is very possible that her personal work has resolved whatever blocks she had around feeling and acknowledging love. It's also possible that her ongoing training may have shifted her boundary/philosophy around saying love towards a client. It is also possible that when you first approached the topic, she was unsure how it would impact you and your work so she was cautious with her response. This last one doesn't seem that probable given your other statements, but it is a possibility.

My T has never told me that she loves me. She's told me that she cares about me and when I said that she loves me, she said true. Having her say love towards me was a big issue for a very long time even if she wasn't saying I love you. There's lots of maternal transference going on; and we use lots of children's books to process concepts. There was a time that I couldn't even have her read I love you as part of the story and I would go in and put 'care for' over top of the word love before she read the story to me.

It would seem to me that she's not mismanaging your relationship given she's always been somewhat transparent about her feelings. I think it is a byproduct of growth within herself, yourself, and your relationship.