I think you are saying that at the moment there is a sense in which your ability to attract others to possibly inappropriate interactions is beyond your control, it is so ingrained.

Aristotle (I think) said that the right hand is stronger by nature, but nature can be changed.

So I still think that mindfulness is the key. I think that if you nonjudgmentally just notice that you are heading in a direction you don’t want to go, there will come a time in which you will actually catch yourself and not go in that direction. You will still be friendly but you will stop yourself before crossing the boundary.

I memorized a certain prayer incorrectly. I noticed each time I said it incorrectly—“(sigh) I did it again”—and it took a long time but I did eventually correct my memory.

My suggestion then is to notice, and to be patient!