You know, Mickey... I feel much the same about myself as you do about yourself (except that I'm old & you're still very young.) Personally I doubt people come to feel the way you do (& I do) for no reason... just one day, out of nowhere, they start hating themselves for no reason. Perhaps I'm wrong but I have to believe there is something in your past that is causing you to feel the way you do about yourself. And I wonder if you know what that is.

In my case, I know most of the reasons why I have the low opinion of myself I do. But at this stage in my life it's simply too late to worry about it. You on the other hand still have many years ahead of you. And so my wish for you would be that, in some way, you would be able to figure out what has caused you to feel so badly about yourself & then find a pathway to deep peace within...

Perhaps you've already seen these. But here are links to 2 articles, from PC's archives, on the subject of what to do when you feel awful about yourself plus a link to 1 article on how like yourself more:

When You Feel Absolutely Awful About Yourself—Regularly

Breaking Free from the Bonds of Badness

8 Steps to Like Yourself (More)