I dont know if this is right section to put this in.

So I've had my fair share of therapist.
So a quick run down age 10 saw therapist for OCD
At 20 saw student therapist for OCD at about age 24 or 25 saw student therapist for general anxiety disoder. the following year I went back to the same place and had a student therapist her supervisor they pushed me to go to the public health system.
Which I didnt want to go because last time I went there when I was 20 that therapist I had wasnt helpful and kinda just at the end discharged me because she didnt know how to help me, I guess. I recalled her saying how I would have to come back one day when I'm ready to deal with my problems. Little did she know what she was dealing with was borderline personality disorder that only specialized people know how to deal with that. I would never suggest a student therapist to work with someone who experience borderline personality disorder. Just, way too depth the daignoses and from my observation from what I'm going to tell you, it's best to leave it to the specialist.

So I went to public health system.
I was given a student therapist. That made my mental health so much worse! He never told me what type of therapy was accept it was psychotherapy. But I was told after 2 years , of increased suicidal thoughts, self harm and suicidal attempts and anxiety. Also my immunity system dropped meaning I was constantly getting colds even in summer! And kept having this skin rash. Due to this therapist! It was psychodymanic therapy! Man! I have never experienced getting worse in therapy!
Sure, you get worse for a couple months because your working on your issues that's expected and normal! But not two flipping years!!!

I mean the therapist wasnt nice either.
Just a few examples, said stuff such as "how my mum shouldn't of had kids" , suggested I should tent outside my mum's house in the backyard. Because that's what he calls "solving a issue". I said how I probably need to move out of home and then he said "well that will never happen". Or say to me "once to get to know my frist I'm nice but after while I'm not". Which really hurt me.
I ended up seeing a therapist on the side because of this and she told me he needed still be in supervision when he graduated after 2 years.

Anyway! So I was given a new therapist. Which went really well and I was given treatment that treats borderline personality disorder. In short it's called DBT. Which means Dialect Behavior Therapy.
Anyway, you would have group therapy once a week for 2 hours. You weren't allowed to miss group therapy 4 in a row or you would be kicked out. The DBT group last for about year and a half because you have to do the group twice. To break the behaviour habits. So you have to be very committed.
Then you meet your individual therapist weekly for a hour.
So its pretty full on.

After when you finished DBT group you are given one year with your individual therapist.

The thing is... with people who experience borderline personality disorder we have a hard time dealing with rejection and abandonment.
Well my therapist told me a mak th ago how we only have 8 months to go and how she is fighting for to keep me on. Because they get pressured by the system to get rid of people because of the waiting list they have for other patients. The dumb thing in this is if they get rid of clients that are not yet ready to be discharged they gonna come back anyway. So I see the system fails in that. That what happened to me in the past. Probably why! Part of the REASON there is a high suicidal rates in my country more than car crashes on the road! Is because they discharged them too early!
And so, my therapist said I need long term therapy. She suggested I see a student therapist because of the affordability at December. So when my therapy ends with her next year March I believe! I wont be left with none thing.

But the thing is! What gets up my nose! Is I have seen two of her clients who have been seeing her longer than I have! So I'm like WTF!?
I have this thought she probably just trying to get rid of me. Because I watched this YouTube video of this therapist explaining how therapist are trained to get rid of clients who cause them too much stress. So they suggest another therapist.

Well since I've been thrown a hot potato to therapists. It hasnt excatly helped me with my rejection or abandonment. I dont want to start all over again! About my life story etc. Definitely not a student therapist!

I was hoping I will end therapy with her and no more therapy. I been going to therapy for 4 years including that crappy therapist. I haven't worked for 4 years due to my mental health.

I dont know what to do. Feeling really overwhelmed.