It definitely changes things. Even the people who love me and accept me the most see me differently now. I don't blame them. My behavior was extreme even if it was out of my control. I just wish I could go back so they would see me as the same strong woman they saw me as before. Now I imagine they view me as a survivor, but a little bit broken. People don't understand fully and feel sorry for me. I feel like they also think its my fault to a degree. They are scared for me that I'll lose my grip on reality again. I'm afraid too, and if I'm honest with myself I see myself differently now as well. It is still difficult to accept the new normal. It still feels surreal.

I'm not sure that my location has anything to do with how people view me. I think I need to focus first on fixing how I view myself. The rest is really out of my control.