It makes me sad to read your clearly identified and articulated desire for warmth alongside your justifications for denying yourself the opportunity to experience that warmth. It's not obvious to me why it's not good for you in the long run to experience boundaried warmth. How can you do any work around "warmth" (your desire for it, your current and past experience of it, etc) if you aren't in the business of warmth with your therapist? Craving warmth is not something you need to minimise (are you afraid of getting lost in the desire?) and self-denial will not improve your relationship with warmth.