I am an introvert and it takes alot out of me to socialize and find I have to limit my time around anyone. Then the next day, I have to rest to recuperate.


Due to the fact I have agoraphobia, I decline most offers to go out to do things. Of the times I have gone out, something went sideways and out of my control and it frightened me, so staying home alone with my cat is all I can manage. Plus during a mood swing and irritability creeps in, I don't want to expose anyone to that aspect of my personality. Neighbors no longer invite me to outings. I watch them coming and going and wish I could be with them, but it's beyond my reach.


Most days I let my hair look like Phyllis Diller (a TV star of the 80's) and so I don't want anyone to see me looking this disheveled.


Some days I am more social than others, but mostly the norm is to isolate.

Then, there are the days that I do venture out and someone bullies me and it takes weeks of feeling destabilized and triggered to find some sort of balance and normalize my emotions.


Birdie