Yeah, you got it... I think September does too (I didn't mean to insult you sweetie are we okay? I guess I just want to put extra emphasis on the "moment" of inception and the result of the "realization". I know it's taken me down a long road that maybe wasn't even neccessary..

Heidu, I like your handicapped analogy... so true... until they recognize they're different... when we realize we're not like everyone else, that we've had a socially unacceptable response to something, or a parentally unacceptable response, it's as if there's an inner self value equation that we attach a huge minus symbol in front of. It seemed so natural at the time.. maybe we had done it before and gotten past it, but maybe this time, our inner accounting system set off lights and bells. Even now I'm challenged to think of other ways to respond. Instead of a minus, what symbol might change the outcome? Could we tweak "plus" to fit? Maybe draw a circle around the whole equation and remove all the symbols to indicate a "whole" self, no mathmatical factoring, no weighing or self judging. What then do we do with the concept of self-improvement? It's too late to change the past, isn't it?

Sorry for my rambling... it's getting late. Night-night

"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but rising every time we fall." Confucius