Stop right there my friend
Feelings are not facts.
I know you feel lonely. It’s human nature to want people in our lives even tho we struggle with just that at times.
Your a fighter , just this year alone you have fought huge battles while IP and all that crazy nonsense your Sister pulled. But your upright you found a job that would be easier to manage with in a day ! Some people look for months.
I’m sorry you feel lonely. I wish I could snap my fingers and the right guy appear for you , but what I do know is there is someone out there that will have the same values and beliefs and you will make a wonderful couple and team together.
Go ahead and feel bad for a bit , cry it out , get made, beat the hell out of pillows, go scream in your car, etc.
Continue with your faith and redouble your full beliefs , that is going to help bring you peace. God doesn’t have you on this earth to be miserable and alone , put your faith in knowing that.
I’m a key stroke away, love ya ~?
PS , You need Matt in your life, so stop this whole quitting T stuff. He has never steered you wrong ! He’s so good for you , he always has your best interests at heart !