Hi, thanks for sharing. Please take care of yourself!
My mother is also getting older, and her health worsening as her drinking and tablet intake seems to go up and up. I am trying to prepare and have started thinking about how I will feel when she is dead as she has had a number of bad falls recently.
I keep thinking that there should be something I should or could do. But I know that there isn't.
Keep tapping in the support you can gain here and don't feel bad about yourself.