Oh, Dear - I hope you feel better with each passing moment.

I certainly hope your pdoc is not retiring.

When mine had retired, he had let me know 12 months ahead of time.
He had retired approx 1.5 years ago. It was very tough! I was with him for 20+ years. I'd thought I would never find another good pdoc/therapist. I was very wrong. I had immediately found an excellent pdoc, who is also my therapist.

We just never know.