Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I wish I had some sage advice to offer you. But I'm a bit short on hope myself. Fortunately for me (or unfortunately depending on how you look at it) I'm old enough that it doesn't make much difference anymore. However, since hope is something you still "hope" to find... here are links to 8 articles, from PC's archives, on the subject of hope:

Does Hope Really Make a Difference? Scientific Findings | Healing Together for Couples

How We Lose Hope and How to Get it Back

3 Ways to Cultivate Hope

9 Types of Hopelessness and How to Overcome Them

The 7 Kinds of Hope

https://psychcentral.com/blog/the-ps...dium=popular17

https://psychcentral.com/blog/a-real...dium=popular17

https://psychcentral.com/blog/findin...dium=popular17