T said the most wonderful thing tonight... it's simple, but you have to understand the context.... I have a hard time with open ended questions and always feel bad for saying "I don't Know" ... i also used to get in trouble for saying it all the time with my folks.

So, t asked me "What can I do this week to support you?" And i said you know i can't deal with open ended questions, and she said she knows, but someday i will and she's going to keep asking them.... i said "I don't know!!!!" in my most pathetic voice. and she said "That's perfectly all right. You don't have to know." I told her she's going to have to tell me that a lot, since i was not allowed to say that to parents. she raised one eyebrow.... said alright! and said "you can always say I Don't Know... one day you might know. ANd you will never get in trouble for saying I don't know".
I nearly cried. I noticed my stomach was all knotted up and hearing that, i was able to consciously breathe and release the knots. That's when i nearly cried - letting go the tension of not being bad and not being in trouble.