Try to find things that make YOU happy. Find some hobbies. Cooking, reading... the things that give you Joy and that you feel like define yourself. Getting over the end of our past relationships is NOT easy so you're DEFINITELY not alone in these struggles. I'd suggest to see a therapist if you arent' already. So yeah, definitely focus on yourself, try to take some time for your hobbies, perhaps try to spend some time with your friends or make some new ones so you won't feel so alone. You can join some activities and clubs based on your interests or perhaps some websites that allow you to meet new people. I hope you'll find PEACE and HOPE very soon! Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @Lostin, and ALL Of Your Loved Ones!