That's a tough question, @pianolady! I'd say that to get more in tune with your emotions yoga and physical exercise may prove to be helpful. Lots of people do that and it seems to help. Definitely give it a try. I believe there may be some books on the subject as well so perhaps you can try to look up for them and see if that's what you're looking for. I'd also suggest to see a therapist if you're not seeing one already and talk about ALL of this with him/her. They're there to help you after all! I'm so sorry I don't have a lot of first-hand advice! I hope other wise, wonderful posters will see this thread and give you better advice than I possibly ever could! In the meantime, it doesn't hurt to try those things that I suggested. See if they work for you. You've got nothing to lose! If you're struggling with anger you may want to buy a punching bag as well and vent your frustrations. Also definitely look for the support of family and friends if you can! We're here to support you as well! Feel free to PM me ANYTIME when you want to talk! I'm sure PLENTY of others will gladly listen to you as well! Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH You, @pianolady, and ALL Of Your Loved Ones!