Opne Eyes and seesaw have already gave you WISE and WONDERFUL advice just like they are so I won't add much more, @Icedgem. I'm not sure if this may help, but perhaps you may try to keep a journal and remind yourself ot the GOOD things in your Life? Sometimes it can help to do that! Also definitely talk things through with your husband when you feel particularly stressed out. I'm sure he'll be glad to support you when that's the case and know how to properly behave when you feel that way! I don't have much more to add, unfortunately I'd say keep taking care of yourself. That's the priority. Do everything that's in your power to reduce the stress! Keep fighting all the way through. You can do this and you've got this! Please NEVER give up HOPE. Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @Icedgem, your Family, your Friends, your Husband and ALL of your Loved Ones!