I have been dealing with a long, messy divorce since 2017. In that time, most of my assets were frozen and I only left with a pick-up load of things. Going from two incomes to one was hard. I really struggled. Also, I couldn't make any investment purchases because I was still technically married and my attorney advised against it. I have SLOWLY rebuilt my life but renting became an exceptional burden and in December, despite some of my gut feelings, I agreed to a joint venture with my mom. She got a sizable inheritance from my late grandfather and offered to buy a house in her name to be re-mortgaged once I got my divorce finalized. The house was basically a dump and so I agreed to work on fixing it up The house was sold under market value as a result, of course. My mom lives several states away, so I was going to be the one coordinating everything. Initially, the idea was we projected a budget of what I could afford mortgage wise and so that amount less the cost of the house itself would be spent on remodeling the house. My boyfriend is also super handy, so he was going to save us a bunch of money by doing some work. Win-win!

She signed the papers in February and we started working on it. As with any remodel, some fixes uncovered bigger issues. But I budgeted for wiggle room here. And we were still golden. Got everything fixed up, new floors, new appliances, we were rockin'!

But then-- a few more problems popped up. As I started to live in the home, I realized there was a bad wire here. A bad pipe there. My mom decided she no longer wanted my bf or I to fix anything. She hired companies that were way overpriced to come in. She forbade me to talk to them. She yelled at them over the phone saying this is her home, not to talk to me, I'm just a tenant. Red flag #1. She has since spent in excess of $15,000 on repairs that should have cost maybe $2-3000 if my bf and I did them. Yeah- these companies took real advantage of her. But she completely shut me out of the loop. I literally only opened the door for them and then retreated to another room while they worked on whatever she told them to.

THEN, in June, my divorce was finalized. YEEHAW!! I was a free woman. Able to buy the home. Even my dad congratulated me and said "GREAT, now you can get that house in your name". But...no. Now my mom said its an investment property for her. She isn't sure she wants to sell. Keep in mind, I have sunk my own $ in to this place by now. I replaced all the plumbing fixtures. I've added my own style to things. I've put in a new fence. I rented a backhoe to help fix a drainage issue. All done with this mindset she was selling to me as soon as I was divorced. So it was an investment in to my long-term home.

The AC unit went out a few weeks ago. I am in humid Texas. Outdoor temps were at 104 degrees F yesterday with heat index over 110F. I need an AC. But I am not going to replace the unit or buy temporary units if she isn't going to sell this to me. I want to paint the house. Patch the walls. Fix a light fixture that right now is just bare wires hanging from the ceiling. But-- I can't do any of those things until its in my name.

She complains of the cost of fixing it up and I have mentioned "Well, I can take over fixing it up if you'll sell it to me". But she just says "No no, let's just get it fixed."

I'm worried now this is more involved than a typical landlord situation would be. I'm paying fair market rent for this house. It's not like she's not charging me or undercharging me. She called me last week to tell me her storage unit is full so she's having a car dropped off there to store in the garage. Umm- okay. What about my car? She just said if I park my truck outside, then I can have a spot for my car. I have a commuter car for work and a truck for my side gig working with horses. Parking one vehicle outside so she can store one of her vehicles? I don't know. I guess. What can I say?

I love this little house. It's everything I wanted. I researched. I found it. I negotiated on it. I met the realtor. I worked out deals. Because, this was supposed to be my house. When i moved in, that was the understanding. This would be my house, once I could legally own it. So I really don't want to move (again) because this is a perfect little place.

I don't know what to do. I considered waiting until tax season when there will be more $$ out her pocket and maybe I can say "Let me buy it. Then you don't have to worry about these costs". But if she reacts badly to that, I'm afraid what my long-term outcome will be.

I think part of this recent change in selling is due to my sister moving out of the home and moving across country to live with the father of her baby. My mom had a tight grip on her and now she has an empty nest and she sees this house as a leverage point to maintain a sense of....connection? Control? I'm not sure.

I just need some impartial advice.