I'm sorry to hear you're feeling this bad, WantPeaceofMind

Maybe you feel you're being dragging down into a dark spyral also because you've been into a lot of stressful experience
You seem strong but you're still a human... It's ok to feel low

It would be great to find a better support in this moment to help you to take care of yourself... because you seem nice and caring It's just you're having a difficult time
Please don't feel so guilty