Hi StruggleStreet, welcome to Psych Central.

I had to sit and think about your challenge a bit before I could respond.

I am sorry that your effort to try and make a new friend ended up triggering you so badly the way you have shared. I suffer from ptsd myself so I know how bad some triggers can get, sometimes extremely disabling in ways others don't understand too.

From what you shared of this woman you tried to befriend, you were not expecting her to dump so much of her problems on you. Given what little you shared about your mother, I have a very strong feeling that your mother had so many issues herself that often when you were just a child with no understanding and so little life skills, were expected to take on HER emotional challenges. Often a child can witness the mother acting normal in public and around others, and then see her have her emotional meltdowns that can actually make any child feel frightened and powerless and helpless too. Actually, sometimes a mother can have one of her emotional meltdowns in a car where her child is suddenly at the mercy of her mother's emotional meltdown trapped in a car too. So, with what you described of how this woman dumped so much on you while you were driving in your car? You could have been triggered from experiencing that in your past too. Well, unfortunately, that is how complex ptsd can affect someone.

On top of getting so badly triggered StruggleStreet, you decided to take some LSD, and that drug is most definitely a hallucinogenic drug. That just made everything all that much worse for you as you have shared. IMHO, I could never take a drug like that with this ptsd I suffer from, and it's not surprising you had a horrible experience that actually traumatized you on top of already being triggered.

From what you wrote it sounds like in your mind, because of how this woman triggered you, you are seeing her as "she is my mother, toxic just like my mother was". And from what you described you were not only caught off guard by all the grief this woman shared with you, but she pretty much overwhelmed you with it despite your efforts to try to steer her away from engaging you that way.

This woman is NOT your mother though, and perhaps she was nice to you and thought she could confide in you and has been lonely with no friends and vented to you not realizing she was overwhelming you. Sometimes a person can have so much in them and be so alone with it that if they feel somewhat safe with a person, next thing they know they are "venting" too much out. Thing is though StruggleStreet, she may not do that with others and if she did others may not get triggered by it like you did because of how your mother had such a bad affect on you.

For example, you vented all the above over 24 hours ago and did not get any replies right? Does that mean you are a bad person? No, instead when different individuals read your thread, they may have simply not quite known how to reply to you. I read it hours ago, sometime this morning and I could not come up with a reply for you right away. I had to toss your dilemma around in my mind for a while to be honest. One thing I struggled to get past to be honest with you is how you were triggered and decided to take LSD. In all honesty, that is NEVER anything I would even consider doing myself, no way. You kinda made it sound like it's no big deal to you too, except for this particular "tripping adventure" that only maginfied your trigger into paranoia. I don't know what to say to that, no experience with that at all personally except that years ago I had such a bad reaction to just taking a few puffs from a joint that I never want to EVER try THAT again.

I can understand however, what it is like to be badly triggered by someone. Maybe even so much so that I may be compelled to try to warn others, especially if they are my friends. Yet, when it comes right down to it StruggleStreet, you cannot control other people. All you can do is share that you had a bad experience and to be careful. Yet, you cannot really expect other people to have the same fears you have and just cut someone off because you want them to. I find most people prefer to make up their own minds, I myself will listen to concerns, yet I prefer to make up my own mind about other people tbh.

I find that a lot of people have been using the label "narcissist" a lot. The truth is, not all people that have some selfish behaviors or don't quiet behave right all the time are actually narcissists. Also, not all people who are sensitive are "thin skinned narcissists" either. This woman is NOT your mother, she just was lonely and recovering from some kind of a bad relationship breakup and needs to vent it out. Not all that different than how you are feeling overwhelmed and venting here hoping someone will respond to you in some way that can ease how upset you are right now. It could just be that this woman is in a new place around all new people and is just trying to make some new friends and happened to meet you and your friends and maybe a kind shoulder she can cry on a bit too.

I have been a member here a long time and I have seen a lot of lonely people just needing a friendly shoulder they can cry on. It doesn't make them a bad person, it just means they need help and support and are taking a chance that their effort to reach out may provide some comfort.

I am not trying to minimize how you have been triggered. I have had some very bad experiences with some extremly toxic people, I know certain behaviors can most definitely trigger me, as I also mentioned I too suffer from ptsd so I understand how sensitive that can make someone.