One of the top 10 rules was to give yourself 17 seconds to complain then move on.

My POV is that dwelling on what is wrong may be one cause or it might make worse depression for some of us so. I think you have to try to get into the habit of acknowledging what is wrong but then do or think of something else.

Of course, while we are suffering and processing trauma (some trauma's are just too much so we can end up processing them years later), we need to talk about it even though it is negative. In my case, I talked and talked about my attempt in 2015 and other things to the point that now it is time to move on. However, I do occassionally bring it up if I think it will help someone (to show I can relate).

I am trying to complain less and love everyone in my life to the best of my ability. Yes, we have to go no contact with abusers but many of us do insensitive things sometimes and it's not good for us to go no contact with the world. Also, if we have crappy jobs or other situations we are stuck in--the negativity around us rubs off!!! That is why it is important to find a positive escape somehow and positive friends (I have no friends other than my family--that is why I am still at PC despite so many wonderful people who have moved on--bless them and I hope they moved on to positive things since most of us find this place because we are suffering or in crisis ). Having complained and complained on here about some things--this is how I am trying to be.