Having a bad reaction to anti-depressants is not automatically mean you are bipolar but it is a strong indicator that you may be. I'm on Lamictal for bipolar type II which is what you probably are if you are bipolar. You don't talk about any extreme mania so if you have experienced mania it is probably hypomania "little mania" which is easier to not notice.

So far the only side effect I've had with the Lamictal is some headaches for the first couple days. It would be benificial to see a psychiatrist to see about a diagnosis and if I were you I would look for one who specializes or is quite familiar with Bipolar Type II. They would be the best to notice hypomania. Also if you are Borderline you may also be prescribed Bipolar meds so if that is the case the meds would not be a bad thing.

A good book to read regardless is "Why am I still depressed?" it talks about Bipolar type II, cyclothymia (a milder version of bipolar) and what is called soft bipolar (which is not in the DSM yet). The book has a lot of helpful information.

Oh, by the way, I'm also taking Trileptal at night which helps me sleep. That was a big problem for me and now I fall asleep rather quickly.