First, when you're surrounded by the wrong type of people, you will always feel weird, alone and isolated. I speak from experience. You need people who are intelligent and open minded.

Second, you also try to adapt your experiences to the conclusion you have already drawn, namely that you are worthless. Other people would think: "a colleague wrote a story about killing me and my boss didn't care, these people are bat **** crazy!" Believe me, this says much more about them than about you! This is workplace bullying, no question! What if you'd try out another belief for a week or two. For example: "I am valuable", or, "I am ok".

Third, people might not know how you feel. The people in church might have thought that you were a happy and active church member even though you felt lonely. You can learn how to communicate your feelings and needs to others.

Lastly, if you feel you have not accomplished anything you wanted, you can start by doing things now. What are your hopes and dreams? When would you feel "valuable"? By the way, I believe that every human being is valuable and that certainly includes you!

P.S. I use first, second, etc. to organize my own thoughts. I don't want to sound preachy...!