I was a daughter, the oldest to be exact. I taught my mother how to be a mother. Then I was and older sister to 4 other sisters, we were poor and my parents had an addiction to opiods. I was never a child, I became a provider, a sergeant mother to my sisters. All I knew was work and school and raising 4 little girls who looked to me for so many answer. Then I became a mother myself, then a wife. And suddenly I became, numb, empty. My days consisted of caring for my family and never myself. I watched myself day in and day out care for people who couldn't see that I wasn't okay. I became psychotic, I started using amphetamines convincing myself it was only to have more energy to care for my family. Until the day I found myself 6 states away from thsm, fleeing for what felt like my life. I abandoned my son and husband, I have not settled in one area since. 20 states in less than a year. I just keep going, running and hiding. I don't remember why I left, how I met the man I was fleeing with, or what my son looked like. And it's been so long since ive seen or contacted them. But I keep wandering, trying to find what feels like home again. If I never find it, who am I? Who am I without being a daughter, a sister, a provider, a mother, a wife? When someone,asks me who are you, what do I tell them? I am me? I am nothing now? Or maybe I'll tell them I am lost, come find me. I spent long enough searching, wont someone else take a look for me?