Or am I the only one?

I have quite frequent moments when I think my bipolar just doesn't really exist. It's probably because my symptoms are quite mild (or at least I think that), I can function well... and because I so desperately want to be totally normal, so my mind keeps telling me that everything is perfectly okay and I actually made up my mental illness for feeling more special or whatever.

It causes me funny situation right now. I had really great time recently (my doctor told me it could have been mild mania) and I really miss it. But I also began to feel like it wasn't something special, like I was just in a good mood and none of the wonderful moments was real. So I miss something that never existed. Isn't it funny?

Do you sometimes feel this way, or is it just me?