Getting to the root of what causes the needs and soothing it permanently is a daunting but yet hopeful scenario . It’s in one way a task children learn playing peek a boo and experiencing secure attachments with good enough well enough attuned caregivers. It is something our minds still want to learn: developmental catch up. It is so sad and I am sorry your former T just added to the terrifying ness of being without enough object constancy by judging and labeling you. It so much better to see it as a basic need like water and air, but psychological. You can’t be judged into feeling secure attachment to others. I am not sure if simply texting back consistently is enough, but for sure talking about what it is like to experience a lack
Of object constancy with a T who sees it as a normal developmental response to your particular sum- total life experience frees you from being labeled as controlling by someone who was supposed to help
you.