When things are going relatively well, I feel pretty good. I may run into some minor bumps and bruises but I jump back pretty quickly. However, if I'm severely hurt or stressed, I crash. And I crash hard. I stay in bed most of the day, I get irritated with my cats, I don't want to take my meds, I neglect my house and myself, etc. It's really hard. I lose interest in things that normally help me have fun. I don't want to talk to people. And I think my life is pretty much down the tubes.

I don't know why I react so harshly to things that most people would easily over look or brush off with ease. I'm very sensitive. I tend to overgeneralize and make things out to be worse than they actually are. And it's difficult for me to pull out of it. The depression can last for hours. Sometimes days. I don't like it. I wish it wasn't this way.

I struggle to be positive. I have an inner voice that chatters negativity when I'm depressed. I can't stop it. That's why I sleep so much. Less noise in my head. Or sometimes I can paint and it's a distraction. That's what I need right now... is a distraction. That's what this post is about. Trying to get some comfort from extreme pain. Thanks for listening.