I'm not feeling very okay. I've considered checking into the hospital but I don't really want to do that. I don't like being locked up. I have no motivation and I've been having unkind thoughts. I'm going to see if my therapist can work me in on Wednesday. I need to get on my meds again but that brings up the issue of paying for them and therapy. I don't have a job and I'm not on any kind of welfare. I don't have anyone to help me financially either. I feel so lost and useless. I don't know what to do.