How eerily similar to my situation. I am in about 1.5 months also into the divorce decision that my wife made. Here is how i have been coping. My soon to be ex has some negative personality traits. Also, since she made the decision to divorce, she has treated me like an absolute ghost. It has been hell on Earth for me, but I try to play with the children. She acts as if I don't even exist in her world, yet we still are in the process of selling our home. Our home will be listing today and it has been excruciating. Our home has meant so much to me, but I must let it go. So, I try to focus on what was bad about our marriage and the negatives. Also, I try to remind myself that I did what I could to get her to reconsider.

I hate to say this, but it appears like your wife is like mine and beyond reconciliation. I would not continue sending her flowers, nor giving any thoughts of reconciliation. Those thoughts still linger in my head, but I remind myself of her absolute determination to divorce me. I did what I could and begged her to reconsider, during the first two weeks. Yet nothing worked, as she is determined. I also have recurring dreams of us reconciling, but only to awaken and find that reality is very different.

Writing down my thoughts has helped a lot. Also, I have found a therapist that has helped me with the moving on process.

I won't lie, I still collapse and cry from time to time, but I must realize that it was her decision and that there is NOTHING I can do to change her mind. Most of all, I have been worried most about my daughter, who is only 6. I also have quite a bond with her son from another marriage. He is 9 and has mentioned that he wants to maintain a relationship with me, but that is out of my hands right now.

Know that you are not alone...

--sarc