I've definitely not been dieting, lately. However, I could be eating more and worse things. For now, I'll just be easy on myself. I'll be tougher later I've mentioned this before here, and perhaps elsewhere, but I have an odd tendency to see myself as thinner than I likely am. It's as if some other people are looking at the carnival fun house mirror that makes them look wider, and I look at the one that makes me look taller and thinner. The scale and cholesterol test results doesn't lie, though. Unless I've got some mystery tumor the size of a soccer ball in me, I am overweight. I often use my big bones and residual ballet leg muscles as an excuse, but I need to moderate this thinking a little bit. I suppose I'm lucky to have my kind of problem than the opposite, though.

I hope no one throws any virtual tomatoes at me, but I am very fortunate that pain is only ever a mild and fleeting problem for me. [Hopefully, I won't hex myself by writing this.] To report on my pain level today, I'd have to say "Not only none, but the opposite." I saw my psychiatrist just an hour ago. I was bragging about how absolutely stable I am right now, but still way beyond. I feel so capable, like I'm on the jumping board ready to dive into sea of productivity. I'm standing there waiting with a smile on my face. I told him that I'm not "racy", but that my energy levels are not just normal, but like the high peak of normal. My thinking seems so crisp and clear.

On my way to my psychiatrist's office, I was listening to Lynyrd Skynyrd's song "Free Bird". I felt free as a bird. I still do right now. I've got to leave this place for a better place for yet an even better place where I'm even freer yet. You can't change this bird that I am. She lives as she lived when she was young, as a young chick flying high with fresh wings. My wings are getting fresher again. Dead skins of cocoons are nearly off.

I told pdoc that if he wanted to, he could push my next appointment forward more than two weeks from now. Though I love to see him, someone in a more dire state may need that time. He almost did it, but kept it the same. I know what he's thinking. Though I spoke slowly and succinctly, I came across as too happy and satisfied. He doesn't think too satisfied is safe, but he's going to have to learn. I did recommend keeping my Seroquel XR dose the same. There's no sense making any change right now. Why mess with perfection? He obviously agreed.