Sorry this ones a bit lengthy:/ I have had a falling out with my father nearly a decade ago. We’ve barely spoken. Only seen him a handful of times for less than an hr. Usually because I happened to run into him at a family event, (holidays, visiting my grandmother, funeral, etc.) He deeply hurt my feelings those many yrs ago, and has done more and more inconsiderate things along the way. i felt betrayed, I lost my trust in him, I lost my respect for him. I tried to confront him multiple times but he plays the victim while telling me how awful of a daughter i am for impeding his happiness...I went to my grandmother for advice ( unrelated to my father per say) about moving , about options for help until i got a better paying job. ( my grandma is my best friend i talk to her all the time about everything) She in turn went to my father who through a fit, made every excuse in the book why he could not help me. She told me i had to speak to him directly... i did not want to but i gave it a shot( btw through those yrs I’ve tried texting him and talking to him etc with little to no response..so i was hesitant to reach out again for something more serious) . He denied me too... him and my grandmother talked again and he ended up agreeing to help me 5 mos later..long story short, he’s helped me with some things for a while but has not done anything emotionally that a parent does for their child. Does not text me. Does not call me. Does not ask how i am doing. Does not ask about work. Does not ask about school. Etc. (yes it may go both ways but I’ve stopped reaching out to him a while ago because of this. ) Yet he gets mad when i dont wish him happy bday but he forgot what day mine was. He gets mad if i dont wish him happy fathers day yet he is less and less of a father to me everyday... he says i chose to be away from him.. i say he doesn’t care.. the only reason hes recently been helping me( which is ending and that’s fine) was because of my grandmother, and i appreciate that gesture it has helped a lot but i know it was not because he wanted to help me, it is because he wanted to satisfy my grandmother.. .... idk if it’s better to break all contact completely now or what i should do... I don’t feel like I should have to beg for my parent’s attention.... yet everyone is telling me how wrong i am... how selfish i am... how awful of a person i am yet NO ONE bothers to hear my side of the story... no one cares to listen to me as to why i feel the way i do... I’m so damn lost...