I think this all the time. It is usually when I stop my meds, or right before, when I think it the most. I hope hope hope that I am not sick and that somehow I can prove it by stopping my meds and figuring out some sort of way to “be ok” off of them. I havent been successful so far... and so for now I am really trying to be med compliant and to accept my condition.

But it is hard because I really dont want to be sick. I really really want to just be ok, I just cant