I agree with Christina and Mickey. Your pdoc is paid to help you in situations exactly like this. You've mentioned several times now that there are people who cannot tell you're manic. Hiding it isn't an accomplishment. The only important thing is getting you healthy so you can make better decisions for yourself. You'll need to come down first, but when you do you'll be able to see this 'high' was really a low point in your decision making.

Mickey also made another excellent point that you reached out here for a reason. You know you need to make some adjustments. You are smart and strong. Take care of yourself. Call your doctor even if your sister will find out. Stay off the computer and get the rest your body needs at night. Honor your body and stay away from strangers. Do all of that and you'll have no reason to be paranoid. You can do this. Just look at how many people care for you here and let that serve as motivation to make the first step.