I am very sorry about your dad - anniversaries are always hard.

As for your dreams - never let go of your dreams. If the "87" in your username is your birth year, you have your whole life ahead of you. Also, I have always felt that jobs that require more education tend to be less stressful than entry-level jobs. I have a doctorate and work in research, for example, but I wouldn't last ten minutes in a grocery store. Some jobs might not be right for you, but that doesn't mean you won't find the perfect job somewhere down the road. Please don't give up on your dreams at such a young age.

As far as wanting to be a good person - I think you are a wonderful person already. Your education and job don't define your worth as a person. Please go easy on yourself, especially today.