I'm so close to just tearing into myself. Today has been horrible and I'm tired of my family. No matter what we can never get ahead. I'm tired of playing the responsible one..I'm tired of it and yet I feel so guilty when I get angry at them because they are doing the best they can I'm just tired of having to be the third adult..the one that jumps in and fixes every thing. I don't want this..it hurts so bad..I feel miserable for being angry..but even when I do jump in and save the day it's never enough. The car's power sterring went out in town today and my mom freaked out..So I had to go and find help..I had to find the towing company..I had to make sure that mom and dad didn't leap into a big fight over money when the big concern was getting home and getting mom's car fixed. I paid to get the car fix and just because I won't go down and fix my great-grandfather dinner tonight my mom gets mad and yells at me after everything I did today it's like it wasn't enough. I know things are hard right now but I'm the child..I'm tired of playing the medator between them and I'm tired of saving the day..I'm tired of being responsible. I just want a vacation..some relief. Sorry now I feel worse because I hate ranting and raving I just had to get this off my chest so I wouldn't cut..Sorry.