My husband and I both have mental health issues but his are worse. Sometimes it seems like things are ok and he can handle his career (he has his own business and works mostly from home) and at least maybe 1/3 of parenting duties, and a tiny bit of house work. I do all of the shopping, cooking, 2/3 of childcare, and 80% of household organizing and cleaning tasks.

I get angry when he tells me he is struggling, and I wish I could be more helpful when he does. He feels like he can’t talk to me about it but I just have no response. I already make most of the money and have the more difficult job, and do sooooo much more around the house even though he might not agree with that he just doesn’t see it. So what am I supposed to do when he complains he can’t handle daily life? The only other person left to do things is me if he isn’t going to do it and I already struggle with trying to be happy with what little he does do. I really want another baby(we just have one), but my husband can’t handle this so how on earth can he handle a second kid? He is willing to have one but has some concerns for obvious and valid reasons.

I feel so disappointed in my life. I never use to feel like this but I am now disappointed my husband can’t be more “normal”. I don’t know why things are so hard and why I can’t have a husband who can handle life and handle a second kid. I just feel like it is so unfair.

Both my parents are dead, they both died in my early 20’s, and deep down I am just broken because of this. There’s a huge hole in our life where they should be and it makes my life 100x more difficult. Not having them for any kind of support or them being grandparents. His mother tries to help us out but she drives us both nuts.

I never thought I would think of leaving him and I don’t want to because I love him and for the sake of our daughter, but I feel like he is holding me back from what I want out of life sometimes. I just don’t understand why it has to be so hard all the time.

The ironic thing is (If that’s the right word) is that I can support us on my income. It’s not quite the life style we want, but I can pay our bills and feed us and have some money beyond that. He was a stay at home dad for a while but while he’s decent at the “dad” part, he made me do virtually all household tasks, planning, shopping, and cooking and I was so resentful my blood was boiling. I don’t expect him to do it all but f*** if he is staying home he has better at LEAST do half the work or it is complete bull ****. And plus he is not happy being a stay at home dad. If he can’t handle life the only thing to go is his career, and we basically know that is not going to work based on past history.

I know everyone will say do counseling, and I am looking into finding someone. I really want to find someone who will take our insurance cuz it’s ridiculous to pay out of pocket