Both myself and my wife have difficulty with our mother-in-laws.
My mother is 70 and is a care giver to my dad who is 80 and who has Alzheimer's
and to my sister who has schizophrenia. About a year ago, I suggested
to them that they should move to our town so I can help them out
and about 6 months ago they did just that -- despite objections from my
wife. Their move to our town has created a significant rift between
me and my wife and I feel we are on a slippery slope leading to
separation and divorce. I care for my wife deeply, but think she
is getting it all wrong and is overly sensitive. My mom suggested that my wife and
my parents break all ties, do not see each other, etc. At this point, I
go to see my parents once a week for 2 hours but talk to my mom pretty
regularly to see how they are doing and how I can help ..
But, my wife is mad as hell and does not
want me to help my parents and prefers if I sever my relation completely
with them. She also thinks my mom is "bad influence" on my
6 year old son and does not want me to take him to see their
grandparents. My mom does have her short comings -- she
is a miser and you could say that she has a type
A personality and is blunt. But, she totally adores my son and
would do anything for his only grandchild. She has also been a
fantastic mother for me throughout my life -- I feel that I can't desert her.
My wife says now that they have moved here, we should move
out of town!

It has also become a tit-for-tat situation .. now that
my son can't see my parents, my son is also not allowed to see
her parents.

My wife has developed an obsession about my mother which
I think is bordering abnormal behavior!

Any ideas and suggestions would be more than welcome.