|
Have you applied for for SSDI?
Of course, it is impossible for me to know your entire situation, as far as your wife and how she's feeling about the possible changes in your employment situation. And I don't know what your financial situation is.
However, from reading your posts it is clear to me that your employment status needs to change ASAP.
As for your wife feeling resentful...I suspect that she is afraid of what the consequences will be if you entirely quit working. My husband is retired and receives benefits from various sources, which is great, but he has severe OCD, is depressed, and flatly refuses to get help for himself. For example, he will not see a therapist. He absolutely refuses to take meds. He has 50% veteran's disability, could get 100% disability (Vietnam). So many people at the VA have offered to help him, but he has a litany of daily excuses for not going over to the VA and filing for full disability.
So yes, I feel very resentful. All he does is make excuses for himself and talk about how he's going to change "tomorrow."
But it sounds like you are consistent about getting the medical help you need, which is hugely important. I hope your wife realizes the importance of that...of you being proactive about self-care (which helps care for her, too).
I think that volunteering for NAMI is an excellent way to connect with your peer community (others who live with mental illness). I facilitated a NAMI Connection group for 16 months. For 14 months it was terrific and I genuinely enjoyed facilitating the group. During the final 2 months, however, I was not doing well mentally. I managed to hide my declining mental state, but by the end of the last of the 16th month I was falling apart. I could not carry the responsibility of the group anymore. What had been an asset became a very heavy burden and I had to stop facilitating the group.
So what I'm saying is that, in my experience, one's own mental state has to be unquestionably stable in order to volunteer with NAMI. It is possible that if you're feeling too unstable to work part-time, volunteering with NAMI might be too stressful right now.
I know one thing for sure: I strongly suggest that you take you wife with you to your pdoc appointment. Whatever else is going on, or will happen, clarification can only help.
`
__________________
|